I am/I am not

Hello there,

So, as you all may know by now, I'm a thinker. Not the kind of thinker that takes advanced placement classes in High school or wore the prestigious yellow cord at college graduation. I'm the kind of thinker that finds ordinary life occurrences are far less ordinary when trying to truly grasp them. The kind that likes to read over past journal entries to see actual proof of how you truly are changed with age. I'm a thinker, I realized that as I was sitting on the couch this evening attempting to watch the new Bachelor. In thinking about how I am a thinker (Note: Only true thinkers think about how they are thinkers), I realized that I'm a lot of other things too. Then, in realizing I am a lot of other things... I realized there are quite a few things I am not.

I am the girl who struggles with time management. I am the girl who gets really excited really quickly. I'm the girl who sings worship songs in the shower every morning and the girl who, although seemingly very confident, gets fairly nervous when meeting new people. I am the girl guys can take home to mom, but don't want to show-off to their friends. I'm the girl you pick to throw you a party. I'm the girl that will have your back in an argument (unless I think you're wrong... then I'll tell you I think you're wrong). I'm the girl that talks back to the television during reality TV and the girl that leaves long-winded, unnecessary messages if I get your machine. I'm playful, loud, and sometimes more sarcastic than I want to be. Those are some things that I know I am.

I am not the girl who enters a competition just to win. I'm not the girl who thinks about conserving energy or saving trees. I am not the girl who washes her dishes right after she uses them or the girl who vacuums underneath her couch. I am not the girl who will show up fashionably late or leave before the fun is over. I'm not the girl you'll find throwing back tequila shots in Cabo on Spring break and I'm not the girl you'd want on your basketball team if you cared anything about the score. I'm not all about jealousy (although I've had my fair share). I'm not risky, I'm not trendy, and I am certainly not boring. Those are some things that I know I am not.

In thinking about all these things that I am or am not... I realized that it's important to know things like that. It's important to know what you are and what you aren't, what you can bring to others and what others can bring to you. I think that knowing things about yourself, no matter how small those "things" may seem, allows you to be more honest about who you truly are. Being truthful to yourself allows you to be honest with others and in my opinion... that's one of the most important things in this life.

True to You~
Tempa

Wonderful Weekend

Hello all,

This has been quite the Easter weekend. I had Friday off, which was nice! Although I love my job, it's definitely starting to turn into a JOB (if that makes any sense). I spent Friday night with a friend here in the cities. As you know if you read my prior post, we watched the Notebook... and I LOVED it!! It was a fun evening with a friend. I spent 9 months in Cleveland, so nights like that are like making up for lost time! The same friend and I drove to meet another friend of ours for lunch on Saturday. Nothing to spectacular, but it was nice. It was Saturday afternoon when the fun started!! On the drive home from lunch, I got a call from my best friend's boyfriend Kyle. Kyle was calling to inform me that he was planning on proposing to Katie that night and he needed my help with the whole ordeal.

WHHHHHAAAATTTTT!!?????!!

That was pretty much my reaction, too. He went all out for her... which, in my opinion, is just what she deserves. Needless to say, she said yes and now my best friend is going to be Mrs. Kyle Nelsen. I'm pretty darn excited about the whole idea of her getting hitched, and especially to Kyle. It's comforting to know that God's got them covered, ya know? Although it has the possibility of bumming me out (being single and all)... it also gives me hope that there's a "Kyle" (preferably not named kyle since that would be awkward) for me out there somewhere too. Anyway... that was the highlight of my weekend! I spent my Easter Sunday at another friend's house since her mother graciously invited me over.

Speaking of Easter, I wonder when this day became more about bunnies and eggs and less about the resurrection of our Savior. Not only is it strange that society chose a giant bunny to deliver the pastel colored eggs, it's sad that said giant bunny has somehow upstaged the fact that a man rose from the dead to save our lives. I guess there really isn't much I can do about it, but it would be nice to know that people recognize the true meaning of Easter.

Ok, well with that... Here's to the Notebook, Congrats to Kate and Kyle, and Hallelujah, Christ is Risen! :)

In Him,
Tempa

Two Words....

The Notebook!!!

If you haven't seen it... you need to. If you have seen it, you need to see it again. That movie is hands down, without question one of the best romanitc movies I have seen in a long time. I hadn't seen it before tonight, but it was worth the wait.

I don't have time to write much tonight, but I wanted to most definitely sing the praises of a wonderful, wonderful movie. I'm off to buy the book tomorrow.

AH!! To have a love like that!!

I'll be seeing you~
Tempa

Hmm..

Ok, so tonight's post may seem a bit out of character for me. BUT... there are parts of me that my internet audience probably doesn't know. One of those parts is the fairly intellectual side that actually gives a rat's tookus about what is going on in this world. A world that, surprisingly enough, extends far beyond my own personal bubble. So tonight... I will talk a bit about the stories that have been gracing our headlines for the last week or so.

Let's get it started with the meat and potatoes! Terri Schiavo. Before I get to yacking about this... let me say that I truly think this is one of the most intense and interesting cases in our lifetime. There's so many levels to it... the moral level, the governmental level, the familial level... the list goes on. It's intense. Now... my biggest beef with the whole thing is that I just don't understand (at all!!) what the government has to do with any of it. How is her life (or lack there of depending on your opinion) anyone's business but her families?? It's rude, borderline unacceptable, for the government and the media and Joe Nothingman off the street to get involved in such a deeply personal situation. I heard (from Christian) that governor Jeb Bush even attempted to gain custody of her. Riiiight. Good one Jeb. Good one. It's just such a touchy thing. Republicans picket and tape their mouths closed in protest to keep her alive, but don't blink an eye when it comes to taking out Scott Peterson. Democrats would fight all night to see Ben Affleck... I mean Scott Peterson... doing yard work at the county jail, but don't really care all that much if Terri dies. It's crazy and touchy and intimate and quite frankly... none of my (or anyone elses) business.

Now, onto other things. What was with the American Idol snafu tonight?? I was a bit upset by that. I am about ready to march myself right down to that Auditorium (or wherever they are)and rip Mikahla's Barbara Streisand wanna-be, vowel-contorting, overly plucked eyebrows right off that stage! Man, she's annoying! I do, however, have to give two thumbs up to my girl Carrie Underwood. That girl has some pipes and she knows how to use them. AND... might I add... use them correctly which is something that very few people on past seasons of that show knew how to do. I've heard people say that last night's number goof was some sort of publicity stunt. A ploy to get more ratings or something, but with an average of like 120 million votes a night... I doubt their spot on the Nielson charts is going anywhere anytime soon.


Alright, there are quite a few more topics I could cover (and get pretty deep into): The school shootings in northern Minnesota and how the shooter was yet another troubled teen that less than stellar adults chose to ignore. The Ashley Smith story and how it is awesome it is that God provided for her (and the other guy) in that instance. The fact that, by the looks of it, my generation seems to be completely out of luck when it comes to social security. There are a lot of other stories I could talk about, but I just don't have the time and, quite frankly, I just don't want to :)

In the immortal words of Mr. Jimmy Fallon... Goodnight and have a pleasant tomorrow~
Tempa

Days like this...

Hey there,

Do you ever have those days where everything hits you in some awkward over-emotional kind of way? Like everything you see on television or everything people say to you has some deep impacting meaning that you can't really put your finger on, but you know is there. The days when tears sneak up on you and 'overwhelmed' is often the only adjective you could use to describe what you are feeling. Today was one of those days for me. I guess the best way to explain how I felt all day is it was as if I had stepped out of my own life and began watching it on some sort of life-sized movie screen. At church this morning, I found myself overwhelmed by how blessed I am to have the friends I have. Kate and Kyle were here this weekend (after a difficult drive up, mind you!) and during the Palm Sunday service today there were numerous times where I was nearly moved to tears by how great it is to have friends like them. Not just them, though, Betsy and Scott, Lish, Nicole... the list goes on and on. All weekend, I have found myself analyzing and thinking about my life. Like I said before, it is as if I have been watching the last few weeks of my life in review. I find myself analyzing and recognizing things that I didn't even really realize happened (or at least made an impact) in the first place. It's kind of surreal, actually, and I have a feeling that you all know at least kind of what I am talking about!

At first thought, I get kind of annoyed at days like this... Like they are some sort of huge inconvenience in my normally laid-back, not-too-emotional way of living, but then I realize that if I didn't have days like this... I would never be as thankful as I am for what I am given. I think there has to be days like these in order for us to truly realize how the Lord provides for us. Being human, we often (far more often than not) fall into the selfish, egotistical, me-centered, I can accomplish everything on my own mentality. I think that days like this, days when we are purposefully shown how the Lord is working in our lives, keep us grounded. Days like this allow us to us to see (and feel!) how the Lord is directly affecting our lives. Days like this allow us all the opportunity to step out of the me-centered mentality and into a mentality that is completely Christ-centered, a mentality where overwhelmed-ness turns into thankfulness and all the "I can accomplish everything on my own" thoughts are turned to Philippians 4:13. In my opinion... it's days like this that make all the other days worth living.

Goodnight friends, and may your tomorrow be a day like this....

Tempa

Bring to the Table

Hello Friends,

First, let me congratulate Matthew and Carrisa Townsley on a beautiful wedding this weekend. I'm partially mentioning this because Christian asked if I was going to write a blog about it, but I also just wanted to comment on how great it was to see everyone and share in Matt and Cassy's special day. (The Gatorade bottles on the reception tables were a nice touch!!)

Ok, there are a few things I want to bring to the table tonight. Both are kinda deep and rather meaningful (at least I think they are), so I really wanted to share these thoughts with those of you who read my ramblings on a semi-regular basis. I was thinking today about my life. The ups, the downs, the hills, the valleys.... you know, the whole she-bang. There are a lot of hills in my life that I am very proud of. Things that I wouldn't change, even if I had the chance, but there are plenty of valleys that I wouldn't be so sure about. I was thinking today (as most of us do at times) about what I would change if I could call a do-over on the last few years of my life. There are big things. Big, deal-breaking, life-changing things, a relationship that went sour or a friendship that I let go of too soon. A path I chose to take or a path I neglected to follow. Things like that are what I call the "Biggin's". Then, there are little things. A sarcastic remark that would have been better unsaid or a seemingly unimportant, albeit juicy, tid-bit of gossip that would have been better kept a secret. If I could call a do-over on the last few years of my life, it is the little things, the things that I could have easily prevented, that I would change. Not the biggin's. The biggin's are the things that make me who I am and even if those "biggin's" weren't the best experiences of my life... I wouldn't do them over.

While continuing to reflect upon my life over a Lean Cuisine Chicken n' Cheese Lasagna, I realized that even if I wanted to call a do-over... I couldn't. I couldn't because I don't have the authority to call do-overs. I'm pretty certain that the Lord is the ultimate Do-Over Caller and I have absolutely nothing to do with the calling of do-overs. It's a little thing we like to refer to as the will of God. In all actuality, it's a BIG thing we like to refer to as the will of God. There are a few things I want to mention about God's will. In Acts 9, Saul meets Jesus on the road to Damascus. Jesus told Saul to go to the city and he will be told what to do. Psalm 32:8 says "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you". Psalm 37:23 says, "The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD". There are tons of scripture all over the Bible that talk of the ultimate authority of God's will. Guidance is promised in the Word of God. At times (a lot of times in my case!), it is difficult to rely on the Will of God and rest in His promises. It's harder than it should be to know that the little, seemingly insignificant, preventable slip-ups and the deal-breaking, life-changing "biggin's" are all part of the bigger picture. The bigger picture that only God can see, no matter how hard I squint to try.

Well, now that I have rambled on for an hour past the time I had planned on heading to bed, I'll close this blog entry up with a short synopsis of my point. There are so many times in life that we wish we were given the chance to try again, so many times we want a do-over. When those times sneak around the corner, I challenge each one of you (and myself!) to face them head on with the knowledge and the promise that God's Will will prevail. Even if it seems like the valleys can't get any lower and the "biggin's" can't get any bigger... God's Will will prevail. That is HIS promise, not mine... and in HIS promise... we can rest happy!

Goodnight,
Tempa

The Amazing Apprentice Idol Road World Challenge!

Reality TV. Isn't it something?! What ever happened to situational comedies?? The good ol' American sitcom with good ol' American storylines. You know, like... boy meets girl, girl blushes, boy tries to impress girl but ends up looking like a douchebag, girl leaves while laughing with her friends. Nowadays it's more like... boy buys girl alcoholic beverage, girl blushes partially because of the 2 glasses of wine she had previously, boy tries to impress girl by talking about his past sexual experiences, girl leaves with boy while texting her friends about why she will not be returning home till morning. Although it's not really part of MY personal reality... that kind of "situational comedy" is probably (although unfortunately) this world's reality. My question for you is when did we turn into a society that would rather watch other people living their lives than live our own? When did we turn into the kind of people that choose to eat bowls of movie-theater-style popcorn on the couch while watching people travel the world instead of making plans to travel the world ourselves?? Now, I know that may seem rather catty, but in no way am I excluding myself from the above mentioned "we". I am, as we speak, only half paying attention to this blog entry since the other half of my attention is entirely invested into this weeks episode of 'The Amazing Race'. Come to think of it, I just finished watching (often in horror) the girls perform on American Idol and I wait with baited breath for 9:00, so I can tune in for the final episode of Real World Philadelphia. And if I were to be completely honest with you (which, I'd like to think I always am)... four out of five evenings of my work week are tenatively scheduled around reality television. So, in theory, I am most definitely one of those people who would rather watch other people live while eating overly buttered popcorn. I just kinda wonder when (and how) I...we... got that way.

this IS reality~
Tempa

The Luckiest

Hi there,

Me again. I know I just wrote earlier today, but I thought of something else that I love about my job and I wanted to share it with you. Ok, so going along with the story I told about the man and his wife in the last entry... I thought of something. Ben Folds sings this song called "The Luckiest". It's not new, so I'm sure most of you have heard of it. Ben Folds sings a verse that that, to me, best expresses how real love is. I don't mean "real love" as opposed to "fake love"... because, in my opinion, 'fake love' isn't love at all. I mean how REAL love is. How it overtakes you. How it takes your breath from your chest and knocks you to your knees. That's Real. As I was driving home from Target, I heard "The Luckiest" and this verse really brought it all home for me:

‘Next door, there’s an old man, who lived to his nineties and one day, passed away in his sleep, well his wife, she stayed for a couple of days and passed away. I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong.’

I think that pretty much says it all. Love isn't just something that makes butterflies in your stomach or something that makes you dot your eyes with little hearts. True love is real... real enough to need each other in this crazy life and beyond. Real, I can’t live without you, breath-catching, word-forgetting, save the last dance for me kind of love is something special. Something that when you get a chance to witness, you'll never forget and something I can only pray is a part of my life someday, as well.

Goodnight,
Tempa

Love the moment

Well, here I am. All moved in and settled. I feel as if there is so much I need to tell you all, but no real way to say it eloquently in such a short amount of time. I will do my best!

Well... to summarize it all... I love my job! I know I have only been there 5 days and it's not very realistic to say you love anything after only 5 days, but it's true. I love it! I work on a team of amazing people, helped and supported by other teams of amazing people. That alone would be enough to love a job, but there's more! There's something about working with the elderly that makes you appreciate every aspect of life. At first, I thought it was the fact that being around really old folks all day makes you pretty excited about the fact that you're still young. Although that might be true, I don't think that's what makes me appreciate life more than I did before. After spending only 5 days with the residents at Martin Luther Manor, I have seen, first hand, how they live their lives. Almost everyone I sat down to talk to (with the exception of those who are deep into the stages of dementia) lived each day as if it was the last day they would ever live. I know that pretty much sounds like something you would find written on a crocheted wall hanging, but it's true. And although I have heard the cliche "live each day as if it were your last" many times, I don't think I have ever seen it put into action. Last week, there was an evening program at Martin Luther Manor, a group called the "Banjo Boys". Residents and their family all gathered into the south dining hall to listen to the group play. Towards the end of the program, they began playing songs that the residents would recognize. They began the song "Save the Last Dance for Me" and one male resident slowly turned to his wife and asked her to dance. She helped him out of his wheel chair and they just stood there, cheek to cheek, dancing in the middle of the crowd. At 2:48 the next morning, he passed away. That story hit me like a brick!! He knew. He knew it was his last dance and even though he was small and frail and not really able to cut a proverbial rug... he didn't want to waste that opportunity. He died knowing the woman he loved saved the last dance for him. Amazing! In short, seeing residents, who very well may be taking their last breath or singing their last song, love every second of whatever it is they are doing... really makes me love and appreciate every second of anything I do more than I ever have before. And THAT... is why I love my job.

Love the moment~
Tempa